today's weight: 113kg / 249lb / 17st 11lbs
loss of: 3kg / 6.6lbs
Can't be disappointed with that.
When I was looking up HYC again, something I found in Scale Junkie's own blog really struck a chord:
I weighed in but I’m not going to play that game where I need to be back down below my lowest number before I start counting it as a victory. I’m not going to let myself negate a pound lost when I beat the heck out of myself over pounds gained.So right.
And so, I'm going to try to celebrate my success in just the way I'm sure I'd advise anyone else in my position to do.
I'm not going to deny I'm gutted to be at this number again but I am going to allow myself to celebrate the loss and look forward to more and more... after all I now know how good 105 is going to feel, I'll be able to wear my jeans again; heck sub-100 is even better, at that point I can look forward to shopping in non-fat shops for tops once more... and oooh the memories of freedom that is to come at 85: the official end of obesity; the freedom of not feeling self-conscious to sit next to anyone on public transport, being able to pick up to a run at the sign of rain, openly talking about shopping and the gym without dying inwardly of shame at my lack of qualification to contribute to such subjects. Each number like a new friend I look forward to being reacquainted with.
What goes up must come down and I REALLY liked it down there.
I just re-read this and in the midst of my attempts to celebrate I still manage to sound terribly ungrateful. 3kg is enormous, almost half a stone in old money. It must seem odd to anyone to think there could be any mixed feelings. I just wished that while I was typing I hadn't started planning in my head and realised it's going to take all of this year to undo the weight I re-gained last year. In all my newfound eager hope I've been getting impatient and that's two years of running just to stay still.
If I make it all the way again this time I just hope I've learned enough lessons to stay there. In the meantime 3kg is bloomin fantastic!