I haven’t posted much this week. I also haven’t weighed myself much this week, especially not since the disappointment of a 200 gram loss just two days after the scales had triumphantly told me I was down over a kilo. 200 grams! As my husband wittily cruelly pointed out the other day (before the weigh-in I should add) I could have shaved my legs to achieve a similar result. He’ll kill me for posting that, especially after I’d built him up as such a picture of sensitivity.
I’m in the doldrums again. My eating and exercise attitude is pretty bad, I’m fighting binge urges and I’m seeing my food in a negative light again. I don’t doubt this is all as a result of stress and being so tired. I'm finding work very stressful at the moment. We’ve got political project nonsense going on that I’ve been dragged into the middle of, plus I’ve been trying to work evenings to catch up on stuff I’m behind on. Worst part of all this, is that I’ve never yet been convinced this is even the right job for me. It’s one thing to tolerate stressful work conditions if you can see it leading somewhere, but I’ve no idea where I want to go.
I work for a hugely respected company, the pay is good and on paper the opportunities are fantastic. They even relocated us from Perth to Melbourne, and that’s an interstate move not to be sniffed at. I just don’t think I want to do this work anymore, it’s not me and it’s not bringing out the best in me.
So how do I work out what is me?