Only got a moment to write - and it's going to take longer than that to reply to the wonderful comments I got yesterday. There was a lot of truth and wisdom in them, I even showed my hubby, thank you ladies (and no you were neither offensive, blunt nor babbling) - but just wanted to speed-blog to say that I've had 3 clean days. The day after yesterday was just fine.
I recognise there's a process at play here. By the time I'd come to post my shame, and before anything had come good, it had already begun. The same every time. If I could only burn it to disk and make a handy play button ready for next time, then I wouldn't have to go through this cycle for more than a day. No more 10, 20 or 30kg weight gains EVER again. That would be bliss.
Night all. Day 4 here I come.....AGAIN